Call her out. “We never said you’d hurt him, i said i like staying home with him” “Weve dicussed this, i dont want him going for overnights, WE will let YOU know if or when we would need our child taken care of by you” “You have time to spend time him now and do regularly, use it for quality time rather than complaining”. The Best Graphic T-Shirts For Men 12/10/2020 You let them sleep over at your family’s but not husbands family?. This is your baby not her’s. Do not make an effort to go there. They live 10 minutes away and expect you to make all the effort. Do not feel guilty about saying no. That is your right to say no. Practice telling her “No that won’t work for us.” “Thank you but I already have a costume.” “No we already have plans,but thanks for asking.” “No I do not need a babysitter.” Do what you feel comfortable with. Stop doing things you are not comfortable with. This is not a contest and your baby to not a prize to be won. Do not let her babysit unless there is a legitimate need and you are comfortable. When she pushes, tell her “MIL I am a SAHM. I did this so I could raise my child and have time with my child. My child is not a problem for me but a joy to be with.” You and DH decide what kind of visits you are comfortable with like supervised visits for short periods. Invite them to dinner at your house etc. If they refuse oh well. DH is a jewel for being on your side.